Dave here, hence the bold, self assured font. Tonight was a mess. Yes I have a tan and matching beige trousers. This much is true.

I felt it necessary to put tonight's epic battle into writing. Forcing drunk French post grads into taxis aside a much greater fight took place tonight (although that was hard enough in and of itself.).

Once all my girl based club dreams (and Martin) had been put to bed I headed straight to the shaorma shop. Today I have eaten two pletcavikas, three miche and one shaorma (in addition to all the energy expended fighting French post grads in taxis). This may not mean much to you but trust me - its a lot. All I wanted was chips, a ciggy, some man rock music and bed. Not a lot to ask. In addition my Romanian is of a high enough standard that I can demand this sort of thing be concocted at my slightest whim.

It was/is roughly five am. I entered the shop and made said request. In Romanian it goes roughly; " Buna Sieara Domnishara. (This is very respectful.) Cartoffi prejits cu sare si vinegar va rog.". Vinegar has an extra long and soft "e". Yes it sounds effing ridiculous. The I vowel sound doesn't even exist. It was absolute torture.

Semantic niggles aside, she refused. She refused point blank on the basis that chips and vinegar don't go together and made me a small shaorma confident in the knowledge that I would both pay for and eat it if it was spicy enough. I like my shaorma hot. But I really wanted a chippy after tonight's ordeal. I love Romania but AAAAAAA I miss Glesga.